The Service

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

What Is Service?

According to the official Los Angeles Superior Court website -

The law says that when you sue a person, partnership, corporation, or the government, you must give formal notice to the other side that you have started the legal process. In the same way, when you are already involved in a case and file papers with the court, you are required to give the other side notice of the paperwork you have filed. The legal way to give formal notice is to have the other side “served” with a copy of the paperwork that you have filed with the court. This is called “service of process.”

"Service of process" means that the other side must get copies of any paper you file with the court.  In “service of process” a third person (NOT you) is the one who actually delivers the paperwork to the other side.  The person who does this is called the “server” or “process server.”

Until the other side has been properly "served," the judge cannot make any permanent orders or judgments.

Process Servers can be: a friend/relative, county sheriff/marshal, professional process server, or anyone over 18 who is NOT part of the case. 

How I Got Him Served

After filing the complaint in court on April 15, 2014, I prepared copies to be delivered to Victor during the "service." Because I could not serve the papers myself and did not necessarily want to wait for the Sheriffs to deliver the papers to Victor, I got a couple of friends to help me with this task. I asked my dear friend Becky, who has worked as a professional process server in the past to act as the official server. She agreed. I also contacted my friend Alan, a talented young man with experience behind the camera, to be the videographer. 

Why a videographer? Mainly, to have proof of the service. Victor has come up with so many excuses and incredible tales in order to avoid responsibility or accountability. I did not want him to deny being "served" just as he denied ever having an intimate relationship with me.

I honestly thought that serving Victor would be much harder. I thought he would be evasive. It was much easier than anticipated. The service was done smoothly and without any complications.  

About the Video

The video was shot by my friend Alan and edited by me. Although the specific portion of the "service" is real footage, the rest was shot for entertainment purposes.  It is intended to simply poke fun at this whole situation, and specifically The Hairbrush Incident covered by TMZ Hairbrush Attack.  

Because Victor had been attacked with a hairbrush, it made sense that he would be in a better position to protect himself from future attacks if he had a hairbrush of his own. So we brought one for him as a gift... along with the summons and complaint.

A Brush With the LAW

Therese Borchard wrote in PsychCentral about how our bodies, minds and spirits begin to "mend" with a dose of humor:

1. Humor combats fear.
2. Humor comforts.
3. Humor relaxes.
4. Humor reduces pain.
5. Humor boosts the immune system.
6. Humor reduces stress.
7. Humor spreads happiness.
8. Humor cultivates optimism.
9. Humor helps communication.

And I would add one more to this list...

       10.  Humor reminds us that what we are experiencing is simply a story.

We get to choose what type of story we want to live - a drama with non-stop suffering? An adventure full of unexpected turns and thrills?  A love story? A light-hearted comedy?  

Finding humor, especially in difficult or challenging situations, can bring so much healing and a better perspective of things.  Who said that life is supposed to be a struggle with loss and distress? Life is FUN. Let's enjoy the ride!

Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.

Part II - The Trailer

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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Many people cannot believe that I have made the decision to sue Victor Alfieri again. Why would I do that? Am I a masochist? It is like starting the whole nightmare again.... or is it really?  I see it more like the Trevino-Alfieri Part II.

This time around is very different.  I am detached from what happened three years ago - even what just happened several months ago when I last communicated with Alfieri (through his PA).  I am not bitter, not at all.  I am not even upset or resentful of Alfieri for what he has done and continues doing. His actions are a different story. Such actions should not be tolerated by anyone... And that is why this lawsuit feels like the RIGHT thing to do.

I have learned to separate the person from the action. This is something that I started learning when I attended USM (the University of Santa Monica) but did not completely comprehend or truly experienced it until recently.  I remember talking to Ron (my professor) when I was still a first-year student, I said to him, "By the time I graduate I will be able to forgive my ex-husband." Ron quickly responded, "why wait? You can forgive him right now!"

People cannot be defined by others or by mere circumstances. They are not defined by their past mistakes or actions.  By separating people from their behavior and actions, I have learned to forgive them while forgiving myself.  What happened in the past, is in the past.

Although there is nothing anyone can do to change the past, there are certainly things that can be done to make amends. We are responsible for our own choices. We can choose to forgive... while still choosing to fight for justice.

So this is how this Part II of the story begins - by standing for the truth.

The video below is a celebration of a new beginning - a celebration of a NEW story!

Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.

Above the Law

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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When I started my relationship with Victor Alfieri in 2010, he told me about all these different issues he had at that time. He was losing his California home, was getting very little work as an actor and had some debt. He showed me a court notice for a hearing to which he had to appear. It had to do with money that a credit card company was trying to collect from him.

He told me that he did not owe that money, that it was his ex-wife's debt, that she had maxed out their credit cards. I remember asking him what items had been purchased with the money owed. He pointed at his big screen tv, at the furniture. I smiled at him and said, "well, you have the items, why do you refuse to pay?" He was clearly angry and started saying that it was his ex who made the purchases, that he was not responsible. Although I believed that he should pay the balance owed, I offered to call the credit card company and/or collection agency to try to get to an agreement before the court appearance.

I did get him a $600-700 reduction. I even got them to agree to take monthly installments. I told Victor  the good news. He was not happy and said he would fight and ask the judge to order his ex-wife to pay for this debt. I asked Victor if he had gotten any other court notices. He said no.  "Everyone has the right to give their side of the story," I thought. However, I still believed he should have taken that offer.

I went to court with Victor. We were sitting in the last row of the small courtroom. He kept mocking people who were approaching the bench when their cases were called. I told him to be respectful because we were in a courtroom. Finally his case was called. He approached and stood in front of the judge.  I was surprised to hear the judge talking non-stop without giving Victor a chance to say one word. I heard the judge state that Victor had ignored all the court notices sent to him. The judge also said that Victor had been given the opportunity to respond and did not do so.

When Victor requested the opportunity to address the court, the judge loudly said, "you already had an opportunity before. Judgment in favor of plaintiff."

When we were walking out of the courthouse, Victor admitted to having received notices from the court and having ignored them, thinking they were not a big deal. I told him that when an issue is brought to civil court, it goes from the hands of the "private" parties and put in the hands of the court system.  Those notices were coming from the COURT, from a judge, I explained.

It is my opinion that Victor Alfieri believes he is above the law. He already used "the law" against me. His lawsuit contained slanderous claims about me. He used my own money to finance that lawsuit. He pocketed additional money from the budget. He finished the movie and has no intention of ever reimbursing me for my investment. And he still believes the "law" cannot touch him...  that I should "move on" and let him get away with what he did and continues doing.

I filed a complaint against him, his mother, Daniela Carloni and his two production companies on April 15th, 2014.  Alfieri was served on April 16th, 2014. See post "The Service"  for video. He has not filed an answer in court yet.  He has until May 16th to respond.

Because I have filed a "verified" complaint swearing under oath that all the statements contained in the submitted document are true and correct to the best of my knowledge, he also has to respond in a similar manner. He has to admit or deny each allegation (paragraph) of my verified complaint. And he also has to do it under oath.  It will be interesting to see his responses. I wonder if he would blatantly lie and deny facts or even statements the he, himself, previously gave under oath during his deposition.

Please go to bottom of the page for the complete complaint filed in court ---

Laws are created to govern our actions and behavior. Laws dictate what is "right" and what is "wrong," what is allowed and not allowed.  These laws are meant to protect our rights and wellbeing. In theory, laws are a great way to maintain balance and fairness. However, it is evident that there are flaws in every country's judicial system - Justice does not necessarily prevail every time.

There is an inherent "legal system" that rules human existence. It is our conscience - that inner voice that tells us when our behavior and actions are "right" or "wrong." We are our own judge. We are the toughest, least forgiving judge we will ever find. We know when we have done something that goes against our principles, morals and values. We know when we are hiding a dark truth. We are also the only ones who can ultimately forgive ourselves. That self-forgiveness can only be achieved if the "wrong" has been acknowledged and somehow rectified either with a sincere apology or proper amends for our actions. Everything can be forgiven - EVERYTHING - as long as we can regain our inner balance and peace through honest, kind, compassionate and generous actions towards others and ourselves.

Please click below [read more] for complete complaint