The Dark Closet

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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Back in October 2011, I set up google alerts so I could be notified if there were new links with Victor Alfieri's name. I did this so I could be prepared in case he leaked more information about "the scandal" to the media. It is surprising that I rarely receive alerts. In fact, none of my links from this blog has triggered any google alerts.

A couple of days ago I received an interesting one... "Is Victor Alfieri Gay? -AllPeopleSay." Here's the link. AllPeopleSay.com. Reading it made me think of such possibility. Has he been keeping dark secrets in the closet? I started to wonder. Do all of his sexually charged jokes toward other males hold a repressed truth?

This article made me think of Victor and his odd sense of "sexual" humor. And as he stated himself during his deposition, "I'm Italian. That's the way we joke. And I like to joke like that." See "Sexual Harassment". If I were to learn that he is indeed gay, I would probably feel much more compassion toward him. His odd, erratic and vindictive behavior would be somehow "justified" by his continuous effort to cover a truth that might be too difficult to face... and to publicly share.

But does it matter what his true sexual orientation is? Does it really matter what anybody's sexual preference is?? It does not make a difference - at least not to me. It is just as if we were judged based on our choosing vanilla over chocolate ice cream.

I am not the type of person who judges others' sexuality. I believe we should all be free to make our own choices. I have many friends who are gay and love them dearly. They explain to me that being gay is not really a choice, that it is something with which they are born... A few of my gay friends have told me that they would choose to be straight if they truly had the choice.

I can only imagine how challenging it must be to try to live a life that is "acceptable" by the majority even if it goes against our own selves. Is it really easier to simply hide all those personal beliefs, preferences, opinions that are not accepted by others?

Just as we sometimes hide things in "junk drawers." We pretend that what these drawers contain actually doesn't exist and believe that by keeping their contents hidden, they will miraculously disappear.  When a guest comes to our home and opens one of those junk drawers, it might be uncomfortable. We don't really want to show that part of us. And on the other hand, we might have even forgotten what we put in there.

Something similar happens with "dark" and repressed secrets. We hide them and push them down trying to bury them. But although seemingly dormant, they grow stronger the more we try to conceal them. We might not even be aware that we are repressing them.

Two years ago, I bought into the belief that what happened to me - what I now call the Trevino-Alfieri Story - was shameful, that I should not discuss or tell anybody about it. Telling my story has been the most effective way for me to MOVE ON and to feel increasingly detached from the events that once hurt me so much.  It would be so much easier for Alfieri if he could do the same thing... if he were able to face those secrets he has been hiding in the dark closet and stopped creating "tales" to cover them.

The degree of shame associated with a "dark" secret is directly related to the effort invested in concealing or disguising it. It makes sense, of course. If it is something of which we are ashamed, we will try to hide it. But, what happens if we stop hiding it? What if we accept it and let it be? I personally believe that there is nothing too dark or shameful that needs to be locked out in a dark closet. As we practice self-acceptance and self-forgiveness, we become more accepting of others as well.

Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.

Alias

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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All my years working as a federally certified court interpreter have paid off. Not only have I improved my interpreting and translating skills, but I have also acquired some valuable knowledge during hundreds of trials as evidence is presented. I have heard testimony from law enforcement, co-defendants, confidential informants and expert witnesses.

In criminal cases, it is the job of the prosecuting attorney to bring in evidence (exhibits and testimony) to support their case against the defendant(s). In theory, the defense has nothing to prove and is not required to present any evidence. However, a good defense attorney will poke holes in the story presented by the prosecution, creating "reasonable doubt."  It is also common for attorneys on both sides (prosecution and defense) to try to discredit any evidence or testimony in order to win.

The best way to discredit someone's testimony, in my opinion, is by catching them in a lie... not a small, insignificant misinterpretation of the facts, but a substantial lie.  And this happens to all of us in our personal relationships as well. When we find out that someone, especially someone close to us, has lied or cheated on us, we stop trusting them and discredit whatever story comes out their mouths.

As I was doing some research for my book, I reviewed some internet links from 2 years ago and the comments people posted. It was actually enjoyable and entertaining to read what people had to say about me and Victor. Most of the comments were clearly from people who did not know us personally. But there was one person, Dawn Westing, who posted two comments in which she asks everyone to please leave Victor Alfieri alone because he is a very talented actor and a very handsome one.

This is her first comment. She is addressing all the people who have posted "mean" comments on the TMZ article.

Victor Alfieri is a great actor for all those people who are negative towards him,, I wouldn't be surprise with the likes of people like that, if I was to bump into those people they would be rude and mean, who knows they probably mean to people and to animals,, atleast with Victor Alfieri, I know what i get a great talented actor,, he was in the movie Angels and Demons alongside Tom Hanks,, and I would like to know what Tom Hanks and other celebrities think of reading this rubbish and gossip,, I feel sorry for all celebrities, they get nothing but put downs ,, so please leave Victor Alfieri alone,,, he is a great actor, director and writer,, I seen him in Angels and Demons and in great tv dramas like Persons Unknown and Undercovers,, he is a true talented actor and a very handsome one,,, and my mum is a fan of him too....

After I gave my brief side of the story to TMZ, this is what Dawn had to say.

This woman is nuts,,, and all she is saying is lies about a great actor Victor Alfieri,, I hope she leaves Victor Alfieri alone and stop her lies.

Two years ago, when I read those comments I thought that they were written by a young girl who had a crush on Victor. I also considered that this person "Dawn" could be a friend of Victor's. I could just picture him coaching her on what to write.  

Now, let's use what I have learned during all those jury trials... Let's quickly dissect these messages and determine who is truly behind them.

"Victor Alfieri is a great actor for all those people who are negative towards him..." What does that have to do with the scandal??? She adds that at least with Victor Alfieri she knows that she gets a "talented actor." Let's not forget that he was in "Angels and Demons" alongside Tom Hanks.  And what she writes next is priceless, "and I would like to know what Tom Hanks and other celebrities think of reading this rubbish and gossip."  Really? Why would Tom Hanks or any other celebrity take the time to read this TMZ gossip piece? 

This comment also states that Alfieri is a great director and writer. This movie is his first feature movie. Nobody knew him as a writer or director back then. And he still needs to prove to the industry, and himself, that he can write and direct. 

From the way these two comments are written, the choice of words, the grammatical mistakes, and the fact that this person calls Alfieri a celebrity... I can only conclude that Dawn Westing is an ALIAS. Dawn Westing is Victor Alfieri himself.  On the other hand, Dawn Westing could also be a real person who wrote the comments under Alfieri's direction. 

Now, let's go back to one of my previous posts, "Public Opinion" which is dedicated to Anonymous. Anonymous wrote a very detailed comment on the post "To Cast and Crew." The way the comment is written is very similar to Dawn's style. I noticed that in both of them instead of using the 3 dots " . . . "  they used 2 dots or 2 commas. The comma instead of the dot is clearly a typo, as the keys are next to each other. But typing two instead of three is clearly a very specific and personal style.

My conclusion is that both people are the same... or at least there is a common denominator. And that common denominator is Victor Alfieri. He was the one who wrote those comments himself or with the aid of a female just to give it the feminine touch.

Using common sense and what I have learned in the legal system, I could conclude that Victor is a liar and is not to be trusted. However, I believe that there is an underlying truth that is even more powerful. It is clear to me that Victor has been meaning to communicate with me for the last 2 years. He cannot face me or talk to me directly. He needs to use aliases or hide behind someone else while pleading to me to "move on" and to forgive him.  He even created a pseudo personal assistant to communicate with me via email.

If I could address Victor, this is what I would say to him.

Victor, I have moved on. This story is part of my life. It belongs to me as it belongs to everyone involved.  Nobody can impose on me the "correct" way of moving on. I am the only one who can decide that. Using the story as inspiration for a book and script is a personal choice I have made. It is my way of moving on. 

Aliases???  Masks????

We all wear masks. Wearing masks is a protective strategy devised by the "ego." We forget we have them on and when we look in the mirror, all we see is the reflection of those masks. We get triggered and react to other people's masks when they resemble ours. It is also true that when we get to see someone without a mask, we feel deeply touched, connected and inspired. We then instantly remove our own mask. And that is when we get to see our true reflection on somebody else.  

Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.

IMDb

Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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IMDb - "the world's most popular and authoritative source for movie, TV and celebrity content."

I remember what a big deal Victor would make about being listed and having credits on IMDb. He would quickly check anybody's name there. He would say that if it was not listed on IMDb, then it was not legitimate film or tv work. When I would come to his apartment to visit him, I would often see him checking his profile on IMDb. I also remember that he would regularly post his personal IMDb link on his facebook wall to have people click on it and increase his popularity rank.

The movie "Looking for Clarissa" is finally listed on IMDb. Here's the link imdb - looking for clarissa. And here's my own IMDb page IMDb - Adriana Trevino.  It is strange that I was not notified of this. Alfieri's personal assistant must be too busy to keep me informed of such developments.

At least I now know that Alfieri has the intention to distribute the movie. He is probably very proud of himself and believes he is finally a filmmaker. I have my own opinion. I will reserve it for now... What I can say is that my opinion of Alfieri as a filmmaker is directly related to his behavior and actions. An egocentric person who believes he does not need anybody's input, will act in a similar way when working as a filmmaker. A person who deceives, lies, manipulates on a personal level will do the same in any business endeavor of which he becomes part.

Making a film requires the work, input and collaboration of many. It is truly a group effort. Everyone's role is essential, as every organ and cell in our body is necessary to keep us healthy, complete... and alive.

I have learned that we are not meant to travel in this life on our own. We are meant to share our journey with others. Our actions, even if apparently insignificant, affect the whole universe, as we are all connected.  It is a fact that if we want to create something, we need to reach out. An experience, a goal, a dream can only become real if it is shared with others.

Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.