Privacy

If your name has been mentioned on any of the posts of this blog and you would like to have it omitted or removed, please contact me directly. --- Adriana Trevino

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Public Opinion



Update as of 10-15-2018 -- The case has been dismissed by both parties.  As we have agreed to move forward, the dismissed case will remain confidential.

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Today I received notification of three new comments on the post "To Cast and Crew." After reading them, I realized that they all came from the same person. The message was just too long to fit in the allowed space for a single comment.

I have corrected some of the grammar and typos. I have also edited and typeset it so it is easier to read. The original comments are published in the post "To Cast and Crew".

Hi Adriana, 
I couldn't help but read your blog. I truly believe you feel hurt by whatever events have transpired, and I commend you for trying to heal or make sense of what these lessons were.
My only concern is bringing all this to public and continuing this saga years later. You mention the names of many people who may feel uncomfortable with being brought into the limelight. For whatever reasons why they have made amends with Mr. Alfieri whether they had issues with him before or not, MUST be respected. You should not be angry with them or accuse them of turning on you. Some people fear conflict or drama.
I personally feel that you have so much healing to do. I do not feel you have "moved on"
I feel that continuing this blog will not allow this wound to heal. I have been in a similar boat where I felt that a man used me. I would continue to think about how I was disrespected and used, and that anger did not allow me to heal.
What helped was actually forgiving him, maybe not forgetting, but I do believe that God wants us to forgive. It is even better for us to do so, even for our health.
When I look back, I can see how there were signs that the man did not love me, and that he perhaps had a motive. Instead of blaming him or even myself, I have made myself stronger and have not allowed myself to be duped again by anyone.
I am concerned for you, as by never ending this story, and by exposing so many people in this story by revealing their real names and roles in this conflict, you will alienate yourself. I am worried that others may be afraid to approach you because they will fear being dragged into this.
Have you ever thought, that through all these lawsuits and through your rating on the web, that maybe the "perpetrator" has now become a victim? Have you not thought that perhaps this man you speak of has learned his own lessons after being dragged through this experience? He must be a changed man or be in his way to change.
If you continue the blogs and Trevino Alfieri saga, neither of you will heal Victor Alfieri will grow sadder and then resentful, and be less likely to have a space to think about what happened and be able to heal.
I just feel you will not be able to heal correctly by publicly rehashing this story. This is out of caring for all those involved. There were 2 parties here
I know of Victor Alfieri very well. Everyone knows he has many close female friends, and seeing him it is knowledgeable what you see is what you get. He never hints of wanting a relationship and is very upfront about who he is. If he wanted money, and you wanted more, a woman should know always that one cannot give a man money in the hopes that perhaps he will be grateful and then give love and affection or a commitment. That is a cardinal rule that every woman should learn.
I understand you were in love, but we, as women need to be strong and allow men to do for us, or have a balance of give and take. 
The best way to move on, is to make peace with all this, and extricate yourself from the man and project once the movie is done.
This was a hard lesson for you, but will cause you growth in life as has happened to me. I could have exposed the man who did me wrong or written a book, but I chose to forgive and live my life in peace and a commitment to myself.
You would be surprised at how much life will give you back when you do so. Please forgive and move on and end this saga.  
I have realized now that life is so short, and all that matters is our health and our family and our peace of mind.
I wish you peace and all of the above.
---- Anonymous



Who would take the time to write such a long comment?  It is my belief that the person who wrote this is either someone mentioned on the post or one of Victor's girlfriends. The way she writes about Alfieri and how he behaves with the "ladies" suggests that she is or has been involved with him. She seems to know him very well. It does not really matter who wrote it. However, it should get a proper response. It deserves its own exclusive post!  So here are my answers to the points raised by Anonymous.


Romantic Relationship

It is true that I had a romantic and intimate relationship with Victor Alfieri. It is also true that I loved him and wanted to help him achieve his dreams. I also trusted him as we had plans to start a production company together. Our relationship was much more than a romantic relationship - we were also business partners and friends. He later proved not to be an ethical business partner... and certainly not a friend.

The following posts tell the story of our relationship (my version):

How We Met
Our Relationship - PART I
Our Relationship - PART II


The main reason why the intimate details of our relationship are mentioned is because he accused me of sexually harassing him. He also claimed I was so obsessed with him that when he rejected me, I stole the movie and "slandered" him by claiming he slept with me.  I have simply given my side of the story and have presented supporting evidence.

The following video tells his side of the story. It is actually entertaining to watch. He is very imaginative!


Lawsuit

I did not start the legal battle. He is the one who started it. Please read the following post if you have not done so yet. "Why Did Victor Alfieri Sue Me?"

The real reason he sued me was because he felt exposed when I disclosed our intimate relationship. Please read "What Truly Prompted the Lawsuit"

And let's not forget that he took my money without my authorization, disconnected his phone, went into hiding and then hired attorney Roger Muse to sue me. He sued with MY OWN MONEY. Do you want proof?  Please read "How the Lawsuit Against ME Was Financed". When I learned about this fact in early January 2013, I asked him to return that money to the budget and use it to finish the movie. He refused.

I filed a cross-complaint because it was the only thing I could do. I had to FIGHT BACK. Filing that cross-complaint and litigating cost me about $50,000 (even with insurance). Did I want to spend the extra money???? Of course not!  Did I want to get into these lawsuits??? Absolutely NOT.

Web/Media Coverage

Victor is the one who slandered me and tarnished my reputation. He filed a lawsuit against me with salacious false allegations about me. These court documents were given to the media - by Alfieri's publicist.

As a result of this internet scandal, I lost 75% of my business/income. A few of my clients who are in law enforcement told me that I should give my side of the story. I had to wait until the lawsuit was dropped. Just a couple of months after I dropped the lawsuit,  I gave a press release clearing Victor's name of any "theft" claims. The truth is that I was threatened by his attorney to either give that release or be sued again. Read "Press Release".

In early January this year, I asked Victor to give a public statement - as we had agreed - and tell the truth about our intimate relationship.  He refused.  I then said to him, "if you won't tell the truth, then I will."And that is the ONLY reason I started this blog.  Telling the truth through these posts has been the most healing experience.

Cast & Crew

Anonymous wrote, "My only concern is bringing all this to public and continuing this saga years later. You mention the names of many people who may feel uncomfortable with being brought into the limelight. For whatever reasons why they have made amends with Mr. Alfieri whether they had issues with him before or not, MUST be respected. You should not be angry with them or accuse them of turning on you. Some people fear conflict or drama."

Most of what I wrote to "Cast & Crew" are words of gratitude and appreciation. There are some people, however, that I confront with my truth while expressing my disappointment.  Most of these people are those who came to me looking for my support while we were filming. There are also a few of them who gave public statements to the press (through Alfieri's attorney). I was simply addressing their comments.

If they have made amends with Alfieri, that is their decision. I do respect it. And I also agree that it would be uncomfortable to be associated with Alfieri's unethical actions. If these people are uncomfortable for having done anything unethical, that is really something personal that they should deal with.

Everyone involved in this saga who has read that specific post knows that I am telling the truth at least to what concerns them specifically. I have been brave enough to speak up. We all have freedom of speech in this country, don't we? By concealing unethical behavior, we somehow allow it to perpetuate.

I know the post "To Cast & Crew" is difficult for some. As Anonynous said, "some people fear conflict and drama." I agree - Nobody likes to see the reflection of their own actions in the mirror... or should we say...  Nobody likes to see the consequences of their actions reflected on somebody else's life, especially when such actions are not very "ethical."

I have offered to remove any names if that request is made to me. The fact that I am ready to speak up with integrity does not mean that others are ready to do the same.  I am completely aware of that. As I have said numerous times, I am simply telling my story... the way I experienced it.

Respect, Peace & Healing

Anonymous wrote, "I just feel you will not be able to heal correctly by publicly rehashing this story. This is out of caring for all those involved."

I respect other people's choices. I really do. They are on this earth to fulfill their own life purpose... to travel their own journey. I am not angry at anyone. It has been over two years now. What I refuse to do is to lie to others and to myself. I have made the choice to stand in my truth and live my life showing who I am in the most transparent way.

I don't have a publicist. I am not a "celebrity." All I have is my words... and my story to tell. I am sharing this experience with whomever cares to listen and/or read. This blog has been a great instrument to tell my truth and to somehow clear my name after Victor made those crazy allegations about me. This blog is a practical tool I have used to document the facts of the story.

What happened is in the past. We CANNOT change the past. That is for sure. But we can change our attitude toward it and stay focused on the present.

Forgive & Forget

I believe that Victor's actions - past and current actions - are not acceptable and should not be tolerated by anybody. If we comply and agree to anything that goes against our principles, beliefs... against our integrity, then we will be partially responsible for the results, right?

I have learned that I will not be heard if I don't voice my concerns.  Every time Victor communicates with me (through his fake PA) via email, I express my disagreement on specific points of post-production. I have also made requests as to distribution goes. Alfieri fails to respond and does whatever he wants. I am, at least, voicing my concerns.

Have I forgiven Victor? Yes, I have forgiven him although he has NEVER apologized to me. I believe that everyone deserves forgiveness. I truly believe so.

Moving On

Anonymous suggests that I have not "Moved On." We all have our own way of "Moving On." I have opted to tell the truth through this blog. I have learned that I LOVE writing and also enjoy making and editing my own amateur video clips.

Please read "Moving On". This is a great post. After reading it, it becomes evident that I have truly MOVED ON. I can honestly say that I am in a wonderful place in my life right now!


End of The Trevino-Alfieri Saga?

Anonymous says that she is really concerned about me and my healing. It is so thoughtful of her, especially because she does not even know me. She wrote, "you would be surprised at how much life will give you back when you do so. Please forgive and move on and end this saga."

My romantic relationship with Alfieri ended when we were in Italy in May 2011. My friendship with him ended soon after that, in June 2011. Our business relationship continues because this movie has not been distributed or released yet.  Just two days ago, I went to his home and met with someone outside who gave me a DVD of the final cut of the movie.

I would really like not to have any connection with Alfieri. I have asked him to buy me out of this movie deal so we don't have to communicate ever again. Why doesn't he sell his properties in Italy and uses the money to buy me out?  I sold my home to finance his dream, didn't I? He could easily sell his assets and pay what I invested, right?

Whatever happens, the saga will continue.... but now the only thing that will keep us connected is the movie I chose to finance for him.

As to the book I am writing - it will be nothing like this blog. It will NOT be about Alfieri or what he did to me. It will be about my journey and how this experience served as a catalyst - how it shifted my life and forever transformed me.

I firmly believe that the tougher the challenge we face, the greater the reward we will receive. It is up to us to see every challenge as an opportunity. If what we had collapsed, it is simply to give us enough space to create something new. Let's take our apparent failures and use them as the foundation to build even greater dreams.


Disclaimer – As of October 15, 2018, all legal issues have been resolved. This resolution was reached during arbitration. There are no pending issues related to fraud or theft. The resolution was mutually agreeable. There will be no more posts written about this story.

2 comments:

  1. Hmm that's a quite informative post. I read about why Victor Alfieri sue you and was surprised that you put your reasons why he did that. I couldn't imaging somebody can be so scared of being exposed.

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    1. The truth is that I don't know the true reasons why Victor sued me. Was he scared to be exposed? Did he believe his own delusional story? Did he think he could get rid of me and get some publicity as well? His first offer to me after he sued me was to dismiss the lawsuit against me if I gave up my investment and granted him my share of future earnings. What I believe is that he counted on me being scared and letting him keep everything. He did not expect me to speak up and tell the truth publicly. I know it is a bizarre story... That is why I decided to write about it. I can only give my side of the story. His "real" reasons for doing what he did will remain a mystery to me.

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